A – Age? I’m maturing. Like wine
B – Bed size? Whose bed?
C – Chore you hate? Trying to figure out what went on the night before. And where the hell my shoes are.
D – Dog’s name? I love Jess, Joey, and Heather’s dogs… and that is enough for me.
E – Essential start of your day item? Vibrator
F – Favorite color? Purple- like royalty. And red- like blood.
G – Gold or Silver? Gold- and no strings attached
H – Height? I tower over New Mexico.
I – Instruments you play(ed)? Stereo.
J – Job title? Administrative Assistant. That means secretary.
K – Kids? No, thanks. I like my life and my vagina just the way they are.
L – Living arrangements? In sin
M – Mom’s name? Your mama jokes are so 1994…
N – Nicknames? Lindsay G, L-Train, LG, hey pretty, you lush
O – Overnight hospital stay? I hope not, I didn’t think it was that serious!
P – Pet Peeve? People that talk about themselves in ABC format.
Q – Quote from a movie? ” The plaque for the alternates is down in the ladies room.”
R – Right or left handed? Right, but it really depends on what I am doing. I can use them both at once if I’m feeling particularly spunky.
S – How many siblings? Just one. The world is overwhelmed enough by me.
T – Time you wake up? I wake up around seven every day but whenever the drunk wears off is when I really start ticking.
U- Underwear? Currently? Or in general?
V – Vegetable you dislike? Judgey wudgey was a bear! Everything is beautiful in its own way. But no seriously- watermelons. They have no business being vegatables. Go back to your home on fruit-whore Island, watermelons!
W – Ways you run late? Wait, what kind of ‘late’ are you referring to?
X – What was the question? “I can’t hear you, I have a banana in my ear”
Y – Yummy food you make? Jalapeno cornbread. Oh, and I make a mean bloody mary. That’s food, right?
Z – Zoo animals? Smell horrible