Taco Munching (Oops, *Crunching*) Time!

7 Apr

It wasn’t a ‘monumental’ game by any stretch of the word, but by golly, was it fun!  We lost unashamedly 4 to 2 to the excellent Chupacabra Kickers and their horrible mustaches after a brief dispute over the fifth inning score (we thought they had one less run than they did).  One guy almost started a fight by asking the ref if he had graduated elementary school and if he could count, but he was held back and we all just kind of quit talking to him for a minute.  It is no wonder that we were confused, however, as I know that a large group of team members met at a nearby bar to pregame before heading to the park.

As we are a first year team, our ‘sister team’ came by before the game and brought us beer.  Just after we started playing another member of a different team came by with Hawaiian Punch vodka to ‘welcome us to the league.’  Well done.  By the time I was up to kick I was fighting the urge to vomit on the third baseman.  I managed not to (shame being the biggest motivational factor) and successfully scored the first female’s run for the great Taco Kickers.  I surmise our champion heckler might’ve been under much the same sort of influence when she yelled at one of the opposing players that he looked ‘like a date rapist.’  That might’ve been one of the best things I have heard in a long time.

A definite success, the icing on the cake came (for me) when our unanimously voted MVP declared that he couldn’t make this week’s game to pass off the cherished ‘Taco’ Mardi Gras MVP trophy necklace, and bestowed the responsibility onto me.  I then went to the kickball social at the sponsor bar and kept yelling “TACO DEL NOCHE!” all evening.  I was probably not the most popular Taco that night.

Our second game is tonight, and while I am stoked (the theme is luau!) I just don’t think I have the capacity to get out and shake my tail feather.  We will see.  It turns out that in that nasty spill I took last summer I broke the roots of two of my front teeth.  They became evil, and after the exorcism that the oral surgeon performed on Monday I just don’t know that I should risk balls flying at my mouth.  I will be there in spirit- with spirit- however, to kick some tacos and make sure my Tacos kick some ass.  I can sit on the sidelines in a grass skirt alongside our mascot- yes, a grown man in a taco suit.  A thirteen-year-old girl bullied the taco costume off of him, actually, during the last game, which I still find to be endlessly awesome.  Sometimes the world is just how I always dreamt it would be when I was a little girl.

It is a glorious, if painful, springtime in Albuquerque.

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