Archive | January, 2014

The Great White North

31 Jan

Prudish.  Conservative.  The lady next to me on this flight was fully scandalized by my two bloody mary orders.

It’s a god damn two hour flight! Sheesh!!

…BUT it is absolutely beautiful and foreign to me. So I love the frozen north regardless.

Pimento Cheese

29 Jan

Pimento cheese, a true southern favorite. I have been craving it a lot lately, and experimenting in finding a perfect recipe since it’s next to impossible to find out here in New Mexico. I finally got my recipe down. I think. 

Taste for yourself!

2 cups shredded sharp cheddar 

3oz cream cheese. The whipped kind blends easier.

1/2 cup mayo

1/4 tsp minced onion 

1/4 tsp garlic powder

1/2 tsp cayenne pepper

(I am making these measurements up. I pour into the palm of my hand and eyeball it. I judge how much cayenne by shaking the jar over whatever I am cooking until it is a good tint of red. I’m real scientific.)

1 4oz jar of minced pimento, drained

A palm full of pickled jalapeno slices

A few shakes of tabasco and worcestershire 

Salt and pepper

All in the food processor, blend it up. Serve on a ham sandwich with pickle slices, as a pinwheel with tortilla, on a burger, on crackers, in deviled eggs, on biscuits with bacon, or as a grilled cheese sandwich.

Bam. That’s what I did with my day.

Ate cheese.


23 Jan

Sometimes pampering yourself is not a nice little perk, it is completely necessary. Today is one of those days.

Tally ho!


Habits and Hobbies

13 Jan

So Bekah, Heather, and I accrued some interesting querks over the last decade or so.

When a test is coming up, a babysitter (for grown adults) is absolutely necessary.

All New Mexico Yankees fans (for no reason) are stupid. We established this rule from the start.

We drank boxed wine called simply ‘Refreshing White’ for years.

When I got upset I’d take a bath. Bekah would sit on the toilet and talk me through it, chain smoking the whole time. Once she and Heather actually accidentally spilled a dirty ashtray INTO MY BATH WATER.

We spent so many times hashing out problems while smoking and drinking wine in the tub.

Skin cream is ALWAYS eye makeup remover.

A round bed is never conducive to sleeping apart. You have to snuggle.

If you’re sad, head to the local watering hole and spill the beans about your troubles. Folks love to buy some pretty ladies some drinks.

Always wear your best shoes.

When in doubt, call Pops.

I can’t say we had a bad time together in the least. It was always interesting. If you can’t tell already, I miss them terribly today.


The Short Bus

8 Jan

He has no sense of his body or regard for personal safety. Honestly, I admire his fearlessness. He’s one ballsy son of a gun. No inhibitions. Throws himself into any and all situations as if he were made of jello and his bones were soft. Alas, they are not, and eventually he was bound to hurt himself.

Little Frank bumped his head. Got a giant goose egg. After about a week I took him to the vet, afraid he had a tumor or cancer or something. Nope. Hematoma. They drained it, sent him on his way.  As I sat nervous in the waiting room the vet came out giggling. She explained he cracked the bone at the back of his skull, explained he might do it again in the future. Told me about how during the examination he was so determined to get a belly rub he rolled off the examination table and smacked his head on the wall AGAIN. Donk. Explained that as they discussed treatment he twirled himself up in a leash, got stuck, and stood motionless in the corner until they came and untied him. She told me he was special, a rare gem, and that he had ‘special needs.’ Advised he wear a helmet.

You have not truly lived until you have seen a dog in a helmet. 




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