Things I would like for my birthday:
A haircut and my nails done
Massage
Flowers
Bowling
Candy
An electric drill
A robot
A garden in the backyard
Peace of mind
Some focus
Comic books
A trip to Maine
Karaoke
Someone to tile my bathroom for me
A vacation
Champagne
Music
A full tank of gas
Snuggles
A cheeseburger
A mulligan for the last 17 years
So here’s my last two weeks in a nutshell.
My old English professor came over in a bathrobe, crying, so now he’s staying with me.
My colleague already lives with me.
My colleague told HR I wanted to file a sexual harassment complaint and that wasn’t real.
Then the man I never wanted to file a complaint against crashed a motorcycle and died.
Then my friends got in a fight, kind of, and I spilt town. Went and had a Santa Fe day.
I can’t do it. Call me when it’s over. There’s too much drama at the holidays.
